Last Updated
by DoubleTrouble2836
Summary: So, two sixteen year old girls, best friends, are suddenly thrown into Middle-earth. The girls are highly immature and act very much like their age. Can they survive Middle-earth let alone the fellowship? This is in the HUMOR category! Re-post! R


A/N: This is a story on a combined account. So yes, there are two of us writing. (You should be scared) We own everything… okay so we lied but that's okay right? We mean we can dream can't we? So read and review. P.S. This is in the HUMOR category. Also a fun Mary-sue. But mostly comedic. So all of you who hate Mary-sues just get over yourselves and have a laugh at this. It was a lot of work. So enjoy.

Last Updated…

Chapter 1: The Vortex

A gray sky descended upon two unsuspecting friends locked in a friendly spat. This was very normal for them, as small arguments like this occurred on a daily basis. But this didn't change the fact that they were best friends. They thrived off stuff like this. Every time they fought it only intensified their friendship.

Tabby walked down the road with her best friend, Kristina, in tow. Kristina was really starting to get on Tabby's nerves at the moment with the constant begging to go back to Tabby's house. All she wanted was to get back on the computer.

"Seriously if you don't shut up about the facebooking I will beat you with a stick!" Tabby said, to her complaining friend.

"A sharp stick or just a regular stick?" Kristina asked, sarcastically.

Tabby retorted, "A super sharp painful stick." Kristina shrunk back.

"That's a direct threat!" She continued, hoping to catch Tabby without a comeback.

"You bet it is."

"But why did we have to leave?" Kristina moaned, further annoying her friend.

"You've been online for the past two hours. You needed a break. Your eyes were going to fall out if you kept staring at the screen," Tabby said.

"That doesn't mean we had to leave our phones behind. I got peoples to text," Kristina said.

"You have facebook on your phone. The whole point of the walk was to get you away from facebook and to make you stop staring at screens. Now tell me does your phone have a screen?" Tabby said.

"Yes…" Kristina slowly answered.

"Well there you go." Tabby felt smug about her tiny argument victory. But soon enough Kristina blurted out a reply.

"But I like facebook," Kristina moaned, pouting like a child.

Tabby turned to glare at her friend in frustration. She loved her friend like a sister, and fought with her like a sister, but Kristina had been so very obsessed with the computer lately. She was becoming very popular at their school.

Tabby was much more the introvert of the pair. She enjoyed staying home, reading and writing. Everything she loved was in her tiny room. It was like a calm cave she could rely on. Of the two she was by far the smartest. She was calmer, and more sensible. As opposed to the volcano of emotion that her friend was.

Her personal tastes were driven more towards random and eclectic things, making her very dark and mysterious. Sleek brown hair that flowed down to her waist accentuated her face and drew out her eyes. Her eyes were clouded with blue and green mystery.

It was the one feature she liked about herself. Mostly she felt plain. Kristina never agreed with Tabby, but then Kristina had nothing to talk about as far as Tabby was concerned.

She ignored her friend's tired ramblings and pushed on down the muddy lane behind her house.

Kristina shrugged and rolled her eyes thinking about her next blurb on facebook. Tabby could really be such a downer these days.

Kristina was the more assertive person of the two. She was bubbly, though not a bobble head like some girls, and enjoyed cheerleading, texting, and going to parties. She loved being out and seen by all. She hated hiding in her shell, and always found herself trying to bring Tabby out of hers. She knew that Tabby resented her for this, but Kristina couldn't help it. It was in her nature to draw attention. Her fixation with her cell phone and computer gave off the obvious impression that she was a very sociable and likeable person.

This complemented her blonde hair and happy attitude perfectly. Not that it separated the two of them, but it was a barrier that pushed the limits of their friendship and even broke them apart at times. Still they were great friends. Kristina just longed for an adventure. She often felt disconnected from her friend.

But when not partying, just like her friend, she'd be at home reading her favorite books over and over again, and writing stories she hoped would one day be published. These were the two things within them that linked them together for life and fueled the struggled friendship.

There was a loud crash of thunder and a bright flash of lighting above their heads. The clouds darkened the pathway ahead of them even more than it already was, through the crowning trees around them.

"Maybe we should head back now," Tabby said, slightly fearful of the impending wetness.

"Awe! Is Tabby afraid of a widdle wetness?" Kristina cooed, lovingly teasing her friend.

"I don't like getting precipitated on okay?" Tabby replied bluntly and rudely.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. So back to the house of Tab and then… facebook, yes?" Kristina was brought swiftly from her deep thinking and drug immediately back into her technology craze.

Tabby sneered, "What do you think, Kristina? Do you think that's what I want? Cause to me I think the answer is pretty obvious, but let's hear the idiot's point of view."

"Well damn… There's no need to get huffy Miss Muffy!" Kristina rebutted, continuing on with the friendly banter.

"Shut up," Tabby said, putting extra emphasis on the 'p'.

"Fine I'm just concerned with updating my f'book status," Kristina said, shortening her words.

"Your what-book now?"

"F as in face you wing nut. Get your mind outta the gutter."

"Well, if it weren't for the gutter my mind would be homeless. Is that what you want?" Tabby sighed and rolled her eyes. The two of them continued back along the path and just about when they were to the house, it started to downpour.

"What the crack!" Kristina yelled.

"Why couldn't it wait for us?" Tabby shouted, running to the door and opening it.

"'Cause rain is a narcissistic bitch, that's why," Kristina said, as they clambered through the doorway.

"No kidding," Tabby said, shaking the wetness from her hair, which was now stringy from the rain.

They shook the rain from their clothes and hair, wiped their muddy shoes on the entry mat, now thoroughly soaked, and proceeded into the living room. They continued through the kitchen into the abandoned house.

"Lettuce get some grub," said Kristina, opening the fridge.

"While you're there, honker, check to see if there's a note from my mom somewhere."

Sure enough Tabby's mother had left a note saying that she had gone out for groceries and would be back around the time her dad came home from work. They disregarded the note and went on through the living room and into Tabby's bedroom.

"Why are you carrying a pan of brownies, popcorn, a big bag of Peanut Butter m&m's, a bag of potato chips, and a two liter of Dr. Pepper?" said Tabby, eyeing her friend in wonder.

"Mamma loves her some junk food," said Kristina as she jumped in front of the computer. Tabby sighed.

It had gone to the screensaver which was a bunch of falling rings showing pictures from the Lord of the Rings movies. "Don't touch anything!" Tabby yelled at Kristina.

"Whiiieee? I'm just going check really quickly. On and off I promise." Kristina crossed her fingers behind her back childishly.

"No! I like that picture!" Tabby said.

"Oh my god you are totally and completely obsessed!"

"Look who's talking."

"Lord of the Flies is dumb. Anyway it'll only be for a second."

"First, it's Lord of the Ring genius pants, and second, you told me that the last time and you were on for like forever and a day and a half!"

"Oh whatever," Kristina reached for the mouse and Tabby slapped her hand out of the way. "Owie!" Kristina said. "What was that for?"

"Just wait!" Tabby said, giggling. But it was too late. Kristina had touched the mouse but something stranger than that was happening now. "Oh my god what did you do to the screen. It's changing!"

"No, really? Don't worry, when I'm done it'll fall asleep again and you will have your precious pictures back before your obsessed eyes."

"No I mean, look at the screen. Look at those words on the screen. I didn't put that there."

"What are you talking about? You're just trying to scare me."

_One ring to rule them all… One Ring to find them… One ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them. _The words scrolled across the black screen repeatedly in bold, fiery letters. The blazing sound of crackling flames resounded in the room and didn't feel like it was from the speakers, but from within.

"Okay, not to bring down your whole Lord of the Rings obsession, but that's just kind of creepy with a capitol weird."

"I-I'm with you on that one."

"I don't know what's worse, that screen or the fact that it's apparently doing that on its own."

"Yeah, ditto. All that, plus super scary with a freaked out on top." Suddenly the screen was engulfed in the flaming text, and then it went completely blank.

"Eeep!" Kristina yelped. "You know you should really get that checked out Tabbs."

"Yeah, probably… a good idea…yeah." Tabby found herself unconsciously nodding.

"Anyway, so if your computer is like done with its little heart attack and or stroke, I'm getting back on."

"Are you insane? You are such imbecile to the millionth power!"

"Dude, harsh. Anyway it's probably perfectly fine. Stop being a scaredy tabby cat."

In their bickering, neither of them noticed a small humming that was increasingly getting louder.

"Wait, shut your face for five seconds," Tabby said. "Do you hear that?"

"Hear what? Hey, it's like a humming. Where's it coming from?"

"I don't know." Slowly they realized it was the same as the sound on the text. It wasn't coming from the speakers. It was everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

"Tabby," Kristina said, "I'm scared."

"Me too," Tabby said. Then the screen started to crack, a small chink in the screen as it grew, just slightly at first, and then it collapsed in on itself in the center devouring the entire screen. They screamed and ducked under the desk.

"What the hell!" They yelled in unison. There was a loud explosion over their heads and the wind from it lifted them off the ground and then threw them backwards into the foot of Tabby's bed.

The keyboard and mouse flew into the vortex in the monitor, along with several objects from her room. The paint began to peel from the walls in curly flakes. Blackness surrounded them as the room slowly deteriorated. They gripped hands tightly, both of them scared beyond their minds. Neither of them could comprehend what was going on around them, and they had a sickening feeling deep within them that it wasn't just going to go away.

"Welcome to Middle-earth," A mysterious and altogether callous voice said, coming from the same place. The two looked up bewildered by the statement and as they stared into each other's pleading eyes the rest of the room fell away from them and the vortex completely consumed them.

There was a rushing feeling of wind that felt as though it was made of something other than air. The girls grasped each other desperately clinging, just hoping not to lose grip and be separated. Neither of them dared to peek out from closed eyelids as blistering hot and stifling air cascaded around them, followed by a steamy mist of natural air.

Just as fast as the vortex enveloped them it was gone and the two girls were sitting on their knees tightly covering their heads in a heap on the ground. They slowly came to the realization that everything was gone except for that gentle balmy heated breeze. It carried the smell of leaves and nature's pungent aroma.

They broke the boundaries of their tightly closed eyes and a sharp bright light pierced their vision. Their eyes slowly adjusted to the sunlight around them as they realized they were lying in the middle of a hazy forest.

"Look what you did!" Tabby yelled at her friend, slapping her repeatedly in the arm.

"Me? What the fudge did I do?" Kristina yelled, moving quickly away.

"If you weren't so obsessed with facebook this never would have happened!" Tabby yelled.

"You're at fault here just as much as I am! Which, quite frankly, is none! Who could have predicted the computer would have a massive heart attack and somehow send us here… wherever here is! But you know what? I will be the bigger person here, because this is why God invented Triple A!"

"Triple A? What is Triple A going to do? They can't help us! We were sucked into a computer and we have no idea where we are! Cheese and rice woman!"

"Franks and beans woman! What are we going to do? Quote food? That'll just make us hungry!" Kristina noticed that surrounding them were objects from Tabby's room, including the factory worth of food she brought. "Dude! The world is right again." Kristina exclaimed kneeling down to the food.

"You are such a pig, how are you skinny?"

"I am not skinny! Look at all this pudge here," Kristina said, poking herself all over her body.

Tabby was going to retort but suddenly an arrow shot directly between them and into a tree causing them to fall over in panic and shock. They screamed and ducked and covered again.

"For the love of Valor! What the friggin' nuts!" Tabby yelled at the ground.

"Ahh! What did I say about quoting food! By the way, did you invite me to your house just to kill me?" Kristina said, accusingly.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?" asked a man from right above them.

They looked up at the man who spoke to them. Tabby's mouth fell open in surprise as she looked up at the man's face. Kristina stared at the man's feet, confused and altogether hungry.

They both tensed under the smoldering gaze of their captor.

A/N: So like we said read and review. Flamers shall be laughed at and made fun of. And you may get a reply. Maybe. It depends how bad you flame us. Constructive criticism is always good.


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